On most days,I want to sing
I don’t really know how to sing
I start with a slow,almost electronic hum to one of John’s songs
And then that hum disappears into silence
On most days,I want to paint
I don’t really know how to paint
I start with scribbling dots and lines
Sometimes, I draw words
A big N there, or a big E
And then, from one letter to the next, my ink runs out
And eventually, I stop
On most days,I want to dance
I don’t really know how to dance
I don’t know, for instance
The difference between jumping around gracefully
While unspooling the joy from the present tense
And dancing.
I hop around,jump around,
And hope to feel a little bit better,
By the end of it
On most days,I want to love
I want to love,beyond alphabets
And beyond language
I want to get rid of the necessity of form
And of object
I want to love beyond nostalgia,
I want to love further than sehnsucht
I want to love, like it’s some familiar
Expression, or even a formal one